In our world, when a southern woman is wronged, and it happens a lot, we take it with a smile. And, we remember. We are like elephants, we never forget. Especially, if you do something to hurt or offend one of our children. Oh, we will still smile and chat with you at bridge. You'll never know that there is a problem as we "enjoy" dinner with you and your husband at the home of mutual friends. I may even come to your house to ooh and aah over your new kitchen (even though I know you can't boil water.)
However, next year when your name comes up for membership in the Junior League, you best be assured that there is a reason that it only takes three anonymous "no" votes to keep one out. Our predecessors built in an "I'll get you back and you'll never know who did it." clause in most old clubs. And, when you are on my committee for the our Couple's Christmas Dance, I'm going to assign you to help check the coats or maybe clean-up (which has to be done immediately following the event just after the band leaves.) I just know you'll do a wonderful job.
If you really push me too far, I will find you alone in a hall and give a piece of my mind, using words you had no idea I knew how to use at a low, steady, firm tone of voice that will leave no doubt in your mind that you have crossed a line you never want to cross again. And, once we are back in public, I will act as if nothing has happened. But, you will get the point.
So next time you see a southern bell and think that she has charm, grace, and beauty but would never stand up for herself, think again. Southern women with grits takes on a whole new meaning. Don't mess with us.