My soul has been saved - right there by the dairy case in Wal-mart. I guess that is as good a place as any. And it wasn't as if I thought I was in need of divine salvation. However this older gray haired church lady with her hat, purse, and coordinating shoes saw things differently.
As I opened the door to refrigerated case to get a carton of milk I noticed her behind me. I asked if I was in her way or if I could get something for her. She didn't say anything until I turned around. I found a small sheet of paper in my face with notes written in a very shaky handwriting separated by lines and noted with colored numbers.
At first I thought she was showing me her shopping list and asking for help. I was wrong. She pointed her crooked finger to line number 4. "You are familiar with Pastor Pascal aren't you?" "No, I don't think I am." "Well you need to listen to this. This is where he talks about God and the Pope and the Rapture." She could tell I was a little lost.
Then she pulled a CD from the hand written list. Only then did I notice that the handwritten list was actually a piece of paper that had been cut and taped together with scotch tape to make a sleeve for the CD. "It's all here. And there is so much more. Pastor Pascal tells you all you need to know for the second reckoning. You know when our Lord Jesus comes back." I thought carefully before I said anything lest I find myself into a deeper soul saving salvation review.
"I'll take these home," referring to the CD and the pamphlet, The Rapture, a Second Look,"and read them tonight." Then I removed the CD from the handwritten sleeve and handed the sleeve back to her. "Here, you keep this and you can use it with another CD and give it to someone else." "But, you won't know what is on the CD." (Knowing I was damned to Hell anyway so a little white lie to please a God fearing church lady would certainly be forgiven.) I continued, "I'll listen to whole thing, not just pieces of it." She smiled. "Oh, the Lord bless you. Glory be to God."
As I left the store I started thinking, is this the Rapture Redux, given our near miss in October 2011 according to Harold Camping and Warren Jaffs' failed prediction of December of 2013 (but we all knew he is crazy as a goat). And we should not forget Grigori Rasputin who told us it would all end in August of 2013. But then he also was the private mystic adviser to the Romanovs and we know what happened to them. So why should I question Pastor Pascal being any more (or less) nefarious.
Post a Comment